Sunday, May 4, 2014

The Nature of Jade

ISBN: 1416910050
Pages: 288
Source: Library

I am not my illness. "Girl with Anxiety," "Trauma of the Week" -- no. I hate stuff like that. Everyone, everyone has their issue. But the one thing my illness did make me realize is how necessary it is to ignore the dangers of living in order to live. And how much trouble you can get into if you can't.
Jade DeLuna is too young to die. She knows this, and yet she can't quite believe it, especially when the terrifying thoughts, loss of breath, and dizzy feelings come. Since being diagnosed with Panic Disorder, she's trying her best to stay calm, and visiting the elephants at the nearby zoo seems to help. That's why Jade keeps the live zoo webcam on in her room, and that's where she first sees the boy in the red jacket. A boy who stops to watch the elephants. A boy carrying a baby.
His name is Sebastian, and he is raising his son alone. Jade is drawn into Sebastian's cozy life with his son and his activist grandmother on their Seattle houseboat, and before she knows it, she's in love. With this boy who has lived through harder times than anyone she knows. This boy with a past.
Jade knows the situation is beyond complicated, but she hasn't felt this safe in a long time. She owes it all to Sebastian, her boy with the great heart. Her boy who is hiding a terrible secret. A secret that will force Jade to decide between what is right, and what feels right.

Hey guys! Today I've got a super awesome review of an really amazing book that completely blew my mind away! :)

Jade DeLuna suffers from Panic Disorder, it's something she's afraid of, something she's ashamed of. Watching the elephants who live in the nearby zoo calms her, the way they go through their days, simple and happy. One day, Jade sees a boy in a red jacket, carrying a baby, watching the elephants. His name is Sebastian and the baby is his son Bo. From the start, their relationship is fragile, but sweet and heartbreaking. Sebastian allows Jade to accept that sometimes you have to follow your heart and take risks.

The Nature of Jade is one of those books that just wrecks havoc in your heart. While it does start off a bit slow aka there's not much happening, every moment pokes and prods at your mind. I don't think I've read a single chapter that hasn't touched me in some way or another. With Deb Caletti's lyrical and beautiful writing, you just become so into the story that even though it's slow, you're still enjoying it. At least that was the case for me. 

Oh Jade, my dear you are a tad bit stalkerish, but I still love you so much. Jade's first glimpse of Sebastian is through the live web cam that she has in her room that gives her a view of the elephants. Because she's too scared to actually approach him, she spends the first 1/3 of the book just watching him from her web cam. Finally, she musters up the courage to go to the zoo, but he doesn't show up. While waiting for him, Jade discovers that elephants are even more soothing up close and she signs up to work with them. The bond that Jade builds with the elephants was so beautiful and touching, it shows how a human-animal bond can really heal a person.

I loved how Deb Caletti outlined the fears of someone diagnosed with Panic Disorder. Before Jade met Sebastian, her life was dictated by her fear of having a panic attack in front of people and being labeled as a freak. After meeting Sebastian, after working with elephants, Jade slowly begin to come out of her shell and take risks to make her life better and to pursue her own dreams instead of being shackled down. After meeting Sebastian, Jade almost seems normal as she is no longer a prisoner to her fears. 

I think one of my favorite lines from the story is: The sea boy and the desert girl. Sebastian and Jade are two completely separate people with different stories. The chances of them being together are highly against them, but they somehow make it together. From the start, their relationship is built on nothing more than elephants. Agh, I have this weird addiction to elephants now! They are just so important!! The "romance" in this story is simple, innocent, and sweet, but at the same time, it's so mature. Yes, Jade did technically fall in love with Sebastian "at first sight," but their relationship grows so much more through the story.

It's really hard to express in words how I felt while reading and after reading this book. The Nature of Jade is just simple beautiful and I highly recommend it. And as you see from the massive amount of quotes I have below, there are a lot of quotable scenes that will definitely stay with you. 

If you don't feel secure, safe, you'll never feel free. If you're not free, you can't be secure. 

American Government is group anesthesia. It's so mind numbingly dull that I stoop to counting the ceiling panels and the floor tiles. 

Fishing is about the expectation of good things, not about the fish.

Sometimes love is a moment that makes everything different from then on. Some people say that's not love, that you can't really love someone you don't know. But I'm not so sure. Love doesn't seem to follow a plan; it's not a series of steps. It can hit with the force of nature - an earthquake, a tidal wave, a storm of wile, relentless energy that is beyond your simple attempts at control.

But nothing stays in midair forever. What hangs there will fall, eventually. Sometimes caught, Sometimes shattered. Always irrevocably changed.

This is your first important relationship. The beginning of the story, not the final answer. If you went sometime, there'd be that possibility - that you don't know the end result, but that's okay anyway. If. It's a beautiful word. If is a key to any locked door. 

Life and our love for others is a balancing act, I understand then; a dance between our instint to be safe and hold fast, and our drive to flee, to run - from danger, toward new places to feed ourselves. 

“It was one of those times you feel a sense of loss, even though you didn't have something in the first place. I guess that's what disappointment is- a sense of loss for something you never had.” 

4 out of 5 stars

Foreverly Obsessed,

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